Tuesday

Yet another Rant. Sorry.

It's Monday again and I am feeling out of sorts, which is how I always feel on Mondays. I actually call them Mon-DUHS which bothers my husband a lot and is why I continue to do it.

Considering that I am posting this on TUESDAY, you can see how scattered I am. Totally forgot to post yesterday.

I find it hard to organize my thoughts and my life in general at the beginning of the week. I would like to write a very profound motivational post, but if you have read this blog even once, you know that is not likely to ever happen. What is more apt to happen is a post where I rant about something and then my mom calls me and says, " Katie, do you like ANYTHING?"
     No! Not today. No rants.
 How about just a list of the things fighting for my attention today...

- How do you get Karma on your side?  More specifically, how do you ask for a miracle? For example-that your husband wins the car
photo curtesy of Google Images

they are giving away at his company without actually praying for that to happen? I have been told by a reliable source (my grandfather) that you don't pray for things like winning the lottery and such because you will go directly to Hell in a handbasket, and you won't win to boot. Soooo.... I figured, take from another reliable source
Photo curtesy of Google Images

(Earl) and "Do good things, and good things happen.." Right?  The problem here is that this may be just a sneaky way of asking the universe for a brand new car. Honestly. I do feel like doing good things and expecting good things to happen is cheating. Crap. Now I just brought honesty into the the mix.
I guess am just going to do good things and if good things happen (brand new CAR), then awesome. If not, then maybe karma will still reward me (brand new HANDBASKET).


-The need to prepare for the rush of emails that I am going to get because of the Census.
Nope, not from the government.
Not from the Census takers.
Even scarier.
From my In-laws.
The minute I opened my census letter I knew I was days away from a full inbox. The in-laws tend to express themselves best and the most through Email Forward Warfare. This happens mostly around election time or any time BARACK OBAMA is president. So yeah, all the time.
Anyway, the cause THIS time?
Behold:


The letter from the Census bureau is written in English at the top but is translated to about 6 other languages at the bottom.
My In-laws will be all up in arms over this because they feel strongly that,
 "if you live in America, you should speak AMERICAN!"  
(This is an actual title of a forward sent to me about 6 months ago.)
I know. You don't have to tell ME.
I am quite positive that the forward will go something like this:


 I am a PROUD American!* I Love God, not Allah!!* I work hard and hold a job!!* I put my hand over my heart when the National Anthem is being played!!*. I support our troops!!* Barack Obama's middle name is Hussein* Barack Obama is going to personally take away your right to bear arms!* Join me in my public outrage* that the UNITED STATES census bureau has the UNMITIGATED AUDACITY to print languages besides english in their letters sent this past week. If you do not speak or can not read english, you should go back to whatever communist country from which you came*!! Let's Take back the U.S*.!!


As you can see, these statements must all be true. Just look at the amount of exclamation points.
If that's not proof, I don't know what is.
Gag.
* These are statements that MUST be in every one of these types of ridiculous forwards. Its is a Federal law.
I hate these emails. I am taking deep breaths and doing finger exercises to prepare for the amount of deleting I see in my future.

Well, it turns out I did have a rant in me.
I should consider changing the name of this blog to RantCentral  or something.

Jeesh.

Happy Monday!!! Tuesday!!!

13 comments:

  1. LOL! I love the rants. I feel the same way about those ridiculous emails!!! See I must too be telling the truth, did you see all my punctuation? I am on with the exclamation points! Go Rhonda! Yay for immigration! Yay pour l'immigration! yay para la inmigraciĆ³n! (Okay I was going to do more..but I don't wanna!)

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  2. @Rhonda. Best comment ever. I KNEW I liked you!!!!!!!

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  3. Had to stop by and say hi. I came over from Tina's blog. Love your post and you are not the only one who feels she is losing it...now that I am blogging, my mind is on my computer all the time. Hubby gets a little irratated over it. Oh well! :)

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  4. Your rants are great!!! Loving reading them :)
    Head over and join on on my giveaway if you wanna!!!
    http://thelifeandtimesofkatiescott.blogspot.com/2010/03/i-bet-you-want-to-win-giveaway.html

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  5. Jaysus. It seems that the Dickhead gene is mutating like crazy over there. Now, please excuse me while I send out more love to The Universe.

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  6. I am waiting for Glenn Beck to tell us that if you fill in the Census form it will plant a chip in your head and the Marxists in the White House will always know what you are doing(well..actually..they know already because you are usually either watching Fox, watching porn on the internet, eating burgers or cleaning your Kalashnikov).

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  7. And breathe. Ok? Actually, I don't think your rants are too ranty - they're just ranty enough to make me feel your pain and think "thank goodness I don't have her in-laws".

    Good luck with the car - I'll pray for you, I'm going to hell anyway.

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  8. I like the part about Barrack Obama personally taking away your right to bear arms. I picture him coming around to each home and loading up guns in a big dump truck. TeeHee.

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  9. I'm so with you on Mondays! Hate em! Takes me over half the day to actually get my brain in gear and by that time work is almost over!

    And nothing wrong with ranting...I think that's why blogs were invented in the first place! :)

    Just thought I'd say hi! I found your blog through MummyTime's Blog Hop.

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  10. Hi! I'm Stopping by from Brenda's FlogYoBlog Friday! I totally enjoyed your rant! Awesome!

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  11. Great Blog, really enjoy your style of writing

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  12. Ugh, I get stuff like that from my in-laws. The same in-laws who usually end every political debate with, "but that's the way God wants it," once they've hit a dead end in their argument.

    How can you debate when all of the points end with a statement like that?!? Maddening.

    Keep the rants coming! :)

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  13. My future in-laws are convinced the Barack is personally coming to take away their guns, he's probably coming to Texas first then Oklahoma, so we're second on the list...I told them it's nutso that they believe that but I'm going to tell them that I saw on the news today that he bought a dumptruck to personally come to everyone's house and take them all away. LOL And if you resist, you'll be tranqed.

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Ooh! I love me some comments!

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